Queerguru takes a long look at LOUD LOOKING an obnoxious addition to the dating game

No one ever said it was easy to keep up with the youth of a generation, especially now that gender, sexuality, and preferred pronouns have come into the equation.  Just when we thought we had safely survived Millennials, then  Generation Z  (also known as Gen Z) came along and we had to start all over again.  Then, when we were feeling smug, thinking we may have cracked it, Queerguru’s (know it all) intern told us that Generation Alpha, which followed Z,  had already been and gone!  

Just in case you are struggling like us, then we can tell you that Generation Alpha is the first generation to be entirely born in the 21st century, and they are growing up in a highly digital world. This generation is marked by their technological savviness, diversity, and early exposure to the COVID-19 pandemic.!! 

Then there is the terminology.  Forget going to school to learn French or Spanish, stay home and learn how to converse in Tik Tok otherwise this can seem as alien as any foreign language. And if you are out there in the dating world, you will need to know that, according to the people at Tinder, total transparency is the hottest dating trend as Gen Z is over ambiguity. The same clarity applies to how we look at one another.

Hence the term loud looking which refers to the kind of attention queer people may receive when they are watched or stared at in ways that feel obvious, invasive, or disrespectful—as if they are on display for entertainment,  It can reduce real, lived identities to spectacle, turning authenticity into something to be consumed rather than respected.

This is totally unlike a quick glance of appreciation, as loud looking lingers. It often includes raised eyebrows, whispered commentary, or furtive phone cameras.   The vibe is less “fabulous” and more “human safari.”

But wait, there’s more, as we also discovered that loud-looking is a more academic term coined by social psychologists who study how we look at each other, especially when it comes to people who are different, niche groups, and marginalized minorities.  This is hardly news to gay nen as queer style have always been about visibility. BUT the big diference now is loud looking shifts the focus of shame—not onto the queer person being observed, but onto the act of looking itself.  It frames the one doing the staring as potentially inappropriate, especially when that gaze feels judgmental, excessive, or invasive.

So who knew it would take a Gen Zen generation to identify and call out any annoying and potentially dangerous social condition and name it

 

Loud looking captures the double-edged sword of queer visibility in 2025: freedom to express, paired with a fresh wave of public scrutiny.  Modern ‘loud lookers’ don’t just stare—they film, post, and comment in real time. If queer style is a language, loud looking is the grammar rule that says, “Observe, don’t objectify.” When in doubt, offer a nod of solidarity instead of a running commentary.  Next time a fabulpus stranger turns heads, remember: There’s a difference between looking and looking loudly. Choose the quiet appreciation, and let them slay in peace.